Stacy Is Easily Shocked

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Stacy came choking and stumbling into the kitchen this morning in semi-hysterical sobs. I grabbed her before she collapsed and tried to figure out between the tears what was wrong.

"I... I... I... was... electrocuted!" she eventually choked out.

I checked her for signs of transparency and sheet-like attire and finding none, I began to secretly doubt her initial claim to have passed beyond. Nevertheless I got her on the couch so that I could either calm her down, or lay her out with a rose on her chest, as the need might be. After a few minutes of gurgled snorts into my shoulder she was able to compose herself enough to give me the run down.

She had been working in the master bathroom shower with the shower curtain off, cleaning away some tile chemicals she had had soaking on the walls. She was using the hand-held shower sprayer to do the job and managed to get a good heavy stream of water to run out of the shower over the wall and down into an electrical outlet nearby. Our contractor had been doing some work in the bathroom and the lights over the sink had been taken out, so he had left an industrial-sized floodlight plugged into that outlet for our use. Evidently the light started flickering as the wall-tsunami ran past the outlet and within another second the water wave had coated the wall past the electrical outlet down to the floor. That's when she started feeling her feet tingle. In a blind panic she dropped the shower nozzle and sprang out of the shower to come find me with the news of her untimely demise.

After fifteen minutes or so of clutching me on the couch she regained the presence of mind to remember: "I left the water running."

I felt a bolt of electricity surge through me as I sprung up and bounded to the bathroom, there to find the shower nozzle spraying heavenward like a park fountain and an inch and a half of water over the entire floor. A nice foot or so of the carpet in our bedroom was mushy and swamp like. I think I may have drowned.

P.S.:  Next time you see Stacy, be sure to compliment her on her new perm.

After the Party I Was Draggin'

Stacy's second party extravaganza, aimed at all L and N's school friends, had a more medieval, reptilian kind of feel. Fire-belching lizards were the theme and dragon slayers were all the scream. The thermally-enhanced critters had obviously been hanging out in Harbor City - in fact, we even identified a dragon lair in our own backyard! Thankfully we had a host of knights and paladins eager to win for themselves undying glory and honor in following the dragon's trail and undertaking many a quest and endeavor.

The mercenary warriors came to us unoutfitted and unarmed, so lots of prep work had to be done to get an army ship-shape. Swords had to be designed and shields had to be painted and decorated; magic dragon-protecting crowns had to be issued and a mob mentality had to be fostered. (That last part was pretty easy.)

Once the merry band of warriors was assembled and trained, it set out on a heart-chilling quest:  the storming of the dragon's lair!

Fortune shined upon the holy horde and they were rewarded with much rich dragon treasure.

After so handily defeating the vile serpent, the band of adventurers undertook many other breath-taking escapades.  First they played a horrifying game of "Throw-the-Ring-Over-the-Toy-Dinosaur-Who's-Pretending-to-Be-a-Dragon.  Then it was risking life and limb watching a fire-spewing volcano erupt in all its thunderous fury.  Then it was back to the castle for cake and ice cream.

Once the burgeoning Beowolves were adequately fed in the backyard mead hall, it was a time of general mayhem and revelry. You can't understand how much you want to party until you've stared a dragon in the eyes and lived to tell about it.

Gracious Queen Florence greets a conquering hero.

Duke Mark and Her Highness R

The dragon-lady and her fairy princess.

The Supreme Monarch grants an audience with a warrior.

The ferocious Harkins clan (we think they are Vikings) made it all the way from
Sweden  and survived the dragon onslaught, only to succumb to the foul
man-eating curly willow tree in the back yard.  So sad.

The only significant casualty of the day actually occurred before any of the crusaders arrived.  L, while helping Uncle Kyle set up out back, managed to take a running face-plant into one of the plastic chairs, knocking one of her few remaining firm baby teeth into the "loose and wiggly" category.  The victim was far less amused than her parents were at the discovery of the rather large tooth-gouge in the back of the chair.

Luckily warrior women overcome tears quickly and recompose themselves for dragon slaying pretty easily.

You Say It's L's Birthday? Well It's N's Birthday Too!

Solar circumnavigations are a big deal in our house.  Whenever one of us logs another 585,000,000 miles or so we feel obligated to celebrate.  L and N now have 7 and 5 orbits respectively under their belts so parties were called for.

Stacy decided to divide and conquer this year.  Two parties - one for family and one for friends.  We scheduled the family shindig to align with a trip by L and N's nephew J and his family.  Stacy put on a brunch and a sizeable chunk of the family was represented.  In addition to Noelia, Bill, cousin J and his new sister A out from Arizona, Gramlynne and Poppa came down from Agua Dulce with Uncle Kyle; Aunt Joyce and Mr. Jay drove over from Monrovia.  As usual, it would have taken a full herd of wild Clydesdales to keep Aunt Claudia from the festivities.

N has undoubtedly inherited his Daddy's
smooth ways with the ladies.

Cuddles for Aunt Noelia

Uncle Kyle enduring the usual onslaught.

Playing It Old School

L and N have taken a trip down Memory Lane.  Not their Memory Lane.  My Memory Land.